Great Grandma: I have some advice for you, don’t get married. Instead, grab a gun. People really listen to you when they think you have a gun.
Mum: I’m not sure that’s the best advice. I’d say stay safe, stay healthy and stay happy
Great Grandma: Boring
Grandma: I’d have to say, get laid
Mum: Mum!
Great Grandma: If you do get laid, don’t get pregnant
Me: I don’t want to get pregnant
Great Grandma: Good. It’s a waste of time. So much time.
Grandma: Thanks
Me: I want a kid, I just don’t want to get pregnant.
Mum: It doesn’t work like that
Grandma: She understands how it works
Great Grandma: Obviously, you’d know all about that
Grandma: Me?
Mum: She means me
Great Grandma: I mean the lot of you. Sex mad.
Me: You had 9 kids
Grandma: Buried my twin in an orange box in the desert.
Great Grandma: Not this again
Grandma: You said the jackals ate her corpse
Mum: Must have been terrible
Great Grandma: Pity is just a form of abuse
Me: Who wants a tea? I’ll make us a cuppa

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